Queen of Side Effects

Queen of Side Effects

Queen of Side Effects

Zoloft. Is. Slowly. Killing. Me. I can’t believe how hard this drug is hitting me, especially since I’m on the lowest possible dose, and I’m no stranger to psych meds. (I took 60mg of Celexa for a year, which is now considered a toxic dose.) I’ve been in bed for the last two days, utterly exhausted and zombie-like. I feel like I have the flu. Needless to say the fun, “spazzy” effect lasted a very short time. (I’m not sure why anti-psychotics are the ones with such a stigma- Latuda or Abilify seem like candy compared to Zoloft.)

What irks me, is I know that this med could really help me. My heart slows down considerably after I take it, compared to its usual pounding in my ears/chest rhythm. I’m already starting to feel calmer, but I really can’t function like this. How do people have the luxury to adjust to psych meds when they have a job? Every other time I’ve made significant med changes I’ve been on a leave from work or I’ve been in the hospital. Now that I’m working, I feel stuck. If I continue with the drug I’ll probably end up missing work due to side-effects, which I really don’t want. If I quit the drug, I might end up missing work due to “craziness” but I could always go back on benzos to get me through the work day, even though that’s just a temporary, band-aid approach.

Oh, how I wish for a perfect world where health was the top priority and you could easily take time off work for mental health issues. When I’m Queen one day, I’ll make it happen.

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